The Dark Tower

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The Dark Tower is one of those movies that’s been moved around on the release schedule for along time before this year. From a lot of what I’ve heard, it combines elements from multiple books in the dark tower series into this movie that clocks in at around an hour and a half. To say this movie is a bit of a mess an understatement. There’s a lot that is glossed over, which actually makes it really confusing and difficult to follow. This could be related to the fact that I’ve never read the Dark Tower books. The story centers on young Jake Chambers (played by Tom Taylor) who discovers that the dreams he has been having are all too real. He teams up with lone gunslinger Roland Deschain (played by Idris Elba) to prevent the man in black, also known as Walter O’Dim (played by Matthew McConaughey) from destryoying everything. Taylor as Jake is pretty hit and miss. There are times where the young actor genuinely seems to be trying and putting emotion into his performance. There are other times where he feels a little too flat. This is better than some of the minor actors’ performances. No performer fits this better than the actor who plays Jake’s stepfather. The man just never came across as natural or emotional. Jackie Earle Haley is a talented actor who was just underused in this movie. He doesn’t get enough to do, or enough screen time. The same can also be said of Katheryn Winnick as Jake’s mother, Laurie. She is one of three performers in this movie that I personally feel stood out. She actually came across to me as a mother who is genuinely struggling. Of course, it’s Idris Elba and Matthew McConaughey who really put their all into their performances. With Elba as Roland, you understand why he is the way he is. Admittedly, there isn’t much development to the character of Walter, but McConaughey actually brings a strong level of menace and intimidation to his role. The Dark Tower has a couple of strong performances, but is let down by sloppy execution with poor pacing issues, clumsy writing, and bland direction. That makes this one of the year’s most disappointing movies.

2 / 10

Unforgettable

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Unforgettable stars Katherine Heigl and Rosario Dawson as two woman who battle each other both physically and mentally when one perceives that the other is taking her place. The best way to describe this movie is Lifetime movie of the week material. It takes a truly special film to have me bored by the time I hit five minutes. Heigl’s Tessa has no subtlety to her. Right from the get-go, they make it overtly clear she’s the villain. I’ve made it no secret in the past that I am not a Katherine Heigl fan. Yeah, she’s not any good in this movie. She pretty much plays crazy by just widening her eyes (and they are like that for the whole movie). The pacing of this movie is grindingly slow, and ploddingly dull. The daughter character was just kind of there. The character feels like someone even the movie just kind of forgets about for awhile before the writer just went “oh yeah, I should probably do something with the daughter to raise the stakes a little bit.” The actress playing the daughter is awful, even if I personally don’t like picking on child actors. The story and writing is atrocious. The movie has a website in it where Heigl can find everything out about Dawson, including a restraining order Dawson filled out against her abusive ex-boyfriend. Here’s the thing I have to wonder. Isn’t that something that wouldn’t exactly be uploaded onto a website where anybody can find it? There’s a point in this movie where we get a first-person point of view of someone sneaking through the house, stealing some of Dawson’s things. The issue with trying to build this sort of suspense up is that they make it incredibly clear right from the get-go who the villain of the movie is. The good thing is that this movie has one saving grace: Rosario Dawson. I honestly think that she’s a different, better movie. Overall, despite Rosario Dawson giving this movie her all, everything else just doesn’t work, making Unforgettable a predictable, ironically-titled slog of a movie that I don’t even think I would show to my worst enemy.

1 / 10  

Thor: Ragnarok

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Thor: Ragnarok is the seventeenth film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. In this film, Thor (played by Chris Hemsworth) must stop the villainous Hela (played by Cate Blanchett) from conquering Asgard and the rest of the nine realms. Despite the number of movies we have had in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, this still felt like a fresh take on the character. The first two movies were generally considered decent, but far from the greatest films in the MCU. Thor: Ragnarok manages to take Thor into the stratosphere. At first, you might think Ragnarok and Planet Hulk wouldn’t mesh very well, but they actually do manage to make the two stories combine really well. The action sequences are amazing, with the right blend of action and humor. Every single actor brings their A-game. As always, Chris Hemsworth has pretty impeccable comedic timing. Tom Hiddleston is excellently weasely as he always is, perfectly transferring into the anti-hero role as opposed to the straight villain he was in Thor and The Avengers. Cate Blanchett really hams it up as Hela in the best way possible. As always, Anthony Hopkins shows exactly why he’s one of the greatest actors of all time. Karl Urban really gets to flex his comedic chops, and does so incredibly well. There are three actors in this movie I really felt stood out though. The first was Jeff Golblum as the Grandmaster. He was just kind of this weirdo, and felt like Jeff Golblum at his most Jeff Goldblum. The second actor that really stood out to me was Mark Ruffalo as Bruce Banner a.k.a. the Hulk. The Hulk’s attitude and dialogue felt like that of toddler, while in previous MCU films, he felt more like an infant. He kind of talks in bare-bones sentences and complains when he doesn’t get what he wants. But the real MVP might just be Tessa Thompson as Valkyrie. She was a hard-drinking badass with a don’t-give-a-fuck attitude. The characters felt surprisingly well developed for a movie like this as well. You understand why Thor, Hulk, Hela, and Valkyrie are the way they are. They show Skurge’s reactions to Hela’s villainous behavior, and the place he feels he’s in, practically through his facial expressions. They actually give some strong resolution to Thor and Loki’s conflict through these movies. Overall, Thor: Ragnarok excelled in almost every way possible, making for one of the best films in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and the best of the three Thor films.

10 / 10

Ghost in the Shell

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Ghost in the Shell is based off of the acclaimed anime of the same name. It centers on a character named major (played by Scarlett Johansson) who is essentially a cyborg. She works as something of a police officer trying to get to the bottom of a mystery involving a mysterious hacker known as Kuze (played by Michael Pitt). Visually, this movie is stunning. At this point in time, the effects are amazing. Scarlett Johansson as the major is really good, and actually does a solid job carrying the movie. You understand that she does have a mix of human and robotic emotions. Out of all the characters in the movie, she is the most well rounded and developed. The action sequences are pretty good too. They are very well handled, and have little to no shaky cam. The pacing of the movie is easily its biggest issue. The way this movie is structured feels very sloppy. It comes off as less of a flowing narrative, and more like they had multiple movies crammed into one 2-hour film. It just didn’t work as well as it should have. This is a movie that could have been a lot stronger than it actually was. In case you are wondering, no I never saw the original anime. I went into this with no prior connotations or connections. The final result was a movie that I can only describe as “OK.” I didn’t love it. I didn’t hate it. I thought it was visually stunning and had some solid acting, but felt a bit too messy when it came to the plot.   

6 / 10

Smurfs: The Lost Village

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Smurfs: The Lost Village is a computer animated film that serves as a reboot to the Smurfs franchise. Smurfette (voiced by Demi Lovato) stumbles upon a strange smurf she has never seen before, and accidentally exposes the existence of these unknown smurfs to the villainous Gargamel (voiced by Rainn Wilson). It doesn’t take long before Smurfette, Clumsy (voiced by Jack MacBrayer), Hefty (voiced by Joe Mangianello), and Brainy (voiced by Danny Pudi) go looking for the lost village, hoping to reach it before Gargamel. I don’t think it’s too much of a stretch to say that this is the best Smurfs movie. The thing that honestly did surprise me was that this movie was actually pretty good. The smurfs are much more suited for animation, and it looks really good. Rainn Wilson as Gargamel was pretty funny. His plan was essentially the same as it was in the live action films. Here’s the thing. This movie makes him clueless and inept. Therefore, it makes more sense why he would want to be the most powerful sorcerer in the world. Perhaps the biggest upgrade was Smurfette. While I don’t think Katy Perry necessarily did bad job voicing her in the live action movies, she felt a little too one note. This movie does a better job trying to explore the character’s feelings, and I actually thought Demi Lovato did a solid job with her voice. Just because I think this was good movie doesn’t mean it’s perfect unfortunately. The use of music in this movie never really fits right. While I don’t think Mandy Patinkin as Papa Smurf is bad, he doesn’t compare to Johnathon Winters. While most of the jokes actually do work, there are some of them that fall flat. The smurfs from the lost village are under-used. You don’t really get to know enough about them, or enough development to them. While this movie is far from perfect, it’s miles better than either of the two live-action movies.

6 / 10